TRAVEL & LIFESTYLE
A Little Self Respect Goes a Long Way

Heather Markel, Writer, Speaker, Traveler, Photographer
21 November 2018
I’ve always admired people that don’t take crap from anyone. It’s a quality I’ve always yearned to have for myself, in all areas of my life.

Halong Bay, Vietnam.
Photograph by Heather Markel, Copyright 2018
During my travels I was “blessed” with the universe giving me exactly the situations I needed to work through this lifelong struggle. It kicked off with someone in my travels treating me with a giant lack of respect and integrity. I realize now they should be ashamed of their behavior (and perhaps they are). But while it was happening I was busy making excuses for the way they treated me. Attempts to speak up led to me being shut down. It’s not the first time I’ve experienced this. I see now that my lack of SELF respect led to others thinking they could be disrespectful to me. This time however, though it was after the fact, I dared to express my feelings about the behavior. I usually don’t because I worry what the other person will think of me if. This time, however, I had enough, and stood up for myself. It was messy. It was wrought with emotion. But, I did it. I figured any person that was my friend would respect my feelings, and I learned this person was not my friend.
“I didn’t realize how much this issue was cutting me off from some of my favorite parts of myself.”
But that was just the beginning. Because I finally dared to stand up for myself, I couldn’t stop doing it. I’ve even been surprised, at times, at what truly bothers me, now that I’m allowing myself to feel bothered, rather than dismiss my own feelings. While in Asia I’ve had a number of experiences I’ve chosen to see as helpful training for me to gain self respect. Here are some examples.

Lanterns in Hoi An, Vietnam.
Photograph by Heather Markel, Copyright 2018
Hoi An ended up being a hotbed of practice for me! I got swindled into a beauty treatment I didn’t want. Long story short I went off on the woman, told her I felt taken advantage of, refused to pay her ridiculous price and walked away. Maybe I said it too strong but damn it, I said my truth. And I walked away. For once I didn’t feel guilty or concerned about how the person that was rude to me felt, I worried about how I felt about their behavior! Victory!
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